Feedback Strategies: Or Should I Say Feedforward?

I like helping people out a lot, so if someone asks me for feedback or an honest opinion on something, I'm happy to give it to them! However, if I want to comment on something but the person did not ask me for feedback exactly, sometimes I get nervous because I do not want to offend them. I spend a lot of time thinking about how to word a message so that they understand my point as well as take it seriously and casually instead of offensively. 

One of the articles I read was Preschoolers and Praise. I liked how it talked about saying things like "Good job on _____" instead of just "Good job." I think that is important because it will make the kids feel better about what they did. If you always say "good job" to someone, I feel like they might notice that it is very repetitive and they might not think those words are important anymore. However, if they can tell that you are really invested in what they're doing and that you notice the small things, I think they will be more likely to keep doing it in the future or do different things and see if their achievement is rewarded.

The second article I read was Try Feedforward Instead of Feedback. I really liked the study they did, where they asked participants to tell a random person what they would like to change about themselves and then the other person had to give them suggestions or ideas. I think it's a great way to give ideas on how to improve, especially since everyone will be honest with each other and (hopefully) not judge one another. I especially loved how at one point it said "We can change the future. We can't change the past." It's a great quote in my opinion, because a lot of times we focus on the past and regrets, when we should be focusing on the present and on the future.

Source: Because this is what everyone will be getting on their stories soon :-)

Feedback Thoughts!

I actually like receiving feedback on my work, whether it be on my writing or on my duties as an Exec member of my organizations. I like knowing HOW I am doing in my work. If I am not doing what I need to be doing, or if I can make what I'm doing better, I'll embrace any feedback coming my way! The only thing that bothers me is when people give negative feedback instead of constructive feedback. If people type something out that comes off as rude, I often get a little upset, but try to fix the issue anyway. However, if people use words like "hey maybe this will work better!" or "hey that looks good but try this!" I don't mind at all - in fact, I love it.

Source: My only request when it comes to giving feedback. (kind of a biochemistry related pun, but it applies)

One of the articles I read was The Psychology of Comparison and How to Stop. I liked this article because I tend to compare myself to others all the time! I often used to compare myself to my sister, who is 6 years older than me. If she made an A in a certain course, and I was struggling in it, I would wonder why! I wouldn't want to disappoint my parents by making less than what she had made. However, I soon realized that although my sister and I may look exactly alike, our personalities and brains are definitely different. Now, I find myself comparing myself to others who are also studying for the MCAT with me. Some of my friends are ahead of studying than me, and I keep doubting my abilities. However, I sometimes need to step back and realize we have different study habits and way of learning things, so I should just keep my head in the game and "be a racehorse" (as the article says) and not focus on how others are doing, because that will only bring me down. 

The second article I read was 6 Bad Mental Habits That Sabotage Your Success. This article was also helpful by putting things in perspective for me. I definitely doubt by abilities all the time, especially if I don't do as well on a test as I would like, or if I am struggling in a class even though I do all my work and study a lot. Everyone has their weaknesses and strengths, though, so I shouldn't berate myself for my weaknesses; rather, I should learn how to make those into strengths. I also second-guess myself on many things, which I know I shouldn't do, but I can't help it! I naturally worry about a lot of things, including my choices and if I made the right decision. I think I have recently gotten a little more confident in myself, but I still need to work on it.